We’re talk­ing the whole can here. Metal and all.

Hey—remember that guy from the Guin­ness Book of World Records who has set the world record for most metal eaten? Yeah, Michel Lotito from France. It’s a lit­tle strange he made into the record books for that. Not strange that he ate the most metal, but the fact that he ate metal at all. Is it a record to do some­thing that no one would do in their right or even slightly unright mind? This par­tic­u­lar indi­vid­ual ate about two pounds of metal a day since 1959 (when he was only NINE) up until his death in 2007. He died of “nat­ural causes,” by which they mean he turned into a nat­ural, dead, ore deposit. There just got to the point that his body was more of a nat­ural resource than a liv­ing entity. There goes the liv­ing earth hypoth­e­sis. I won­der if he had any gold teeth. How do you buy a min­ing stake in Michel Lotito?