Cookie Mon­ster prob­a­bly has really ter­ri­ble eye­sight but nobody on Sesame Street seems to be inter­ested in pro­vid­ing the nec­es­sary health care. Oscar was manic depres­sive for years until some­one started to give him Paxil (but only when view­ers began to com­plain) and Big Bird was too big until some­one fixed his pitu­itary gland. Oh wait, that hasn’t hap­pened yet. Like­wise, nobody has done a thing for Cookie’s goo­gly eyes. No won­der he had to drown his sor­rows in but­ter and sugar, the guy can only see the let­ter “C” for cookie (also known as Crack Cocaine) on a vision chart. Psy­cho­log­i­cally speak­ing, “C” also might rep­re­sent “Care,” “Com­pas­sion” and “Car­rot,” which are all things that Cookie knows, deep down, are the things he really needs. If any­one would lis­ten. ELMO LISTENS! Besides Elmo. Ignore Elmo.